WOMEN AND VALUES

All of us know the shloka "Matru devo bhava. pitra devo bhava;acharya devo bhava."

Indian culture has always given a lot of respect to the mother – she is considered as the first God. Women, in India, were famous for their knowledge and capabilities – Maitreyi and Gargi were famous scholars.  Jeejabai was as much respected as her son, Shivaji Maharaj. Today, most of the women are known for winning beauty contests or being involved in scandals.

It has been often said that the home is the first school and the mother is the first teacher for a child. Yet, how many mothers today are performing this role?  If we compare them with their own mothers, there is a lot of difference.

Our mothers used to have about 10 to 15 people in the family to look after.  They managed to do all the household work, keep everyone happy and at the same time, inculcate values in their children. Through the stories of Dhruva, Prahalad, Rama, Krishna, Harishchandra and many others, they taught their children the importance of being truthful, generous, patriotic and having faith in God. They practiced these things in their own life and hence, the children learnt from their actions, too.

Most of the mothers today do not have time to spend with their children. Children are sent to baby sitting centers or friend’s houses and at these places too, there is no one to teach them good things.  Being very good imitators, children pick up the qualities of the people with whom they spend most of the time and thus, develop many bad habits and wrong attitudes. 

The behavior of the mother too is not the selfless, sacrificing way of the previous generation mothers. Women today have their own desires and aims in life and focus has shifted from the “we” to “I”. In pursuit of her ambitions, the mother often neglects her family and the worst affected are the children. Any small sacrifice that she may make for her children is highlighted and children are made to feel guilty.

There are a lot of magazines for women – they claim to be supporters of “Women’s Liberation”.  The same magazine which carries articles on the unfairness of using women for advertisements will carry a picture of scantily clad women on the cover. These same magazines carry the message that divorce is a good way of getting out of difficult situations; they encourage the practice of live-in relationships.  In the name of “freedom”, what kind of values are we giving?

The institution of marriage is nothing more than a contract to live together for physical pleasures. Extra marital affairs are a common thing. The Indian system of marriage was based on the principle of  Dharmena kamaha  i.e., the fulfillment of desires through righteous means. Desire of many is brought down to desire for one and over a period of time, physical desire gets transformed to mental love and later to love without expectations i.e., spiritual love. Thus, both the husband and wife progress spiritually.

In the Navnath Bhaktisaar, there is a story of king called Bharathaharinath and his queen called Pingala. To test if his wife loved him, the king sent a fake message to his queen that he had died.  On hearing this, Queen Pingala immediately  immolated herself. Such was the level of bonding in those times.

Rani Jeejabai was mainly responsible for Shivaji’s valor. Right from a young age, she told him stories from the Ramayana and Mahabharata and inculcated values of courage, hatred of evildoers, love for freedom, patriotism, kindness etc. She taught him to worship the family deity of Bhavani and Shivaji’s faith was so intense that Bhavani Devi Herself gave him a sword with which he vanquished all his foes.

India was at the peak of her glory during the times when such strong women existed. Today, when the moral values in society are disintegrating, it is largely due to the lack of such strong women.

Women play many roles in life – wife, mother, sister, daughter. If they inculcate good qualities in themselves, in each role, they can play a major role in improving the moral values in others.

What are the reasons why moral values have gone down in society today?

a.      Shadripu have increased - kama, krodha, lobha, moha, madha and matsara

b.      Spiritual pollution – raja and tama gunas are increasing Sattvikata is reducing due to lack of spiritual practice.

Only when society as a whole does spiritual practice, it can hope to progress. Why is spirituality so important? Because only by doing spiritual practice it is possible to bring about permanent changes in one’s personality.

Harish Acharya,(Barkur),Bangalore. acharyaharish@gmail.com