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A Doctor in
heaven
   
A Doctor, a Nurse, and a Health Ins. Agent died and lined up at
the gates for admission to Heaven.
St. Peter asked them to identify themselves. The doctor stepped
forward and said, "I was the Head of the department of
Obstetrics & Gynecology and as Medical Superintendent of a
Catholic run hospital, I delivered and saved thousands of
babies, practiced holistic medicine, handled millions of
surgeries, taught doctors and nurses, performed quite a few
Caesareans as well, for over several decades. I was a Nun
too, professed and practiced Poverty, Obedience, and Chastity,
prayed and helped profoundly for the poor, unhealthy, and the
neglected ones. I was an organ donor. I gave my young breast,
functioning ovaries, and curled up uterus to cancer you know a
very painful disease…." St. Peter said, "Well done my child,
you can enter. Your suffering will not go to waste. I remember
how Julius Caesar was delivered. That’s how the term
Caesarean delivery! There were no scalpel blades then except
for the Roman swords for sagaital cutting open of his mother’s
abdomen.
Roman mural from the 16th century (year 1506) showing an
apparent caesarean delivery
I feel sorry for those women, and I guess all of them are up
here. Wine was the only anesthetic, for pain. You know, I
shared and enjoyed wine often with Jesus, (only during dinner
time) in Jerusalem. Hope those vines are watered, fertilized,
and well pruned for the future populace.”
The Nurse said, "I took care of all the neonatal ones, some even
pre-mature babies delivered by Doctor, this would be the First
Nun cum Doctor Saint and took care of the post partum mothers
until they were discharged." St. Peter also invited her in
saying, “Is that open needle used? Put it in the needle
disposable container. We don’t need any cross contamination up
here.”
The third applicant stepped forward and said, "I was the Health
Insurance Manager and I helped all those babies and their
mothers to get cost-effective health care."
St. Peter said, "You can come in too. However….." As the manager
walked by, St. Peter quietly added, "But you can only stay three
days. After that you have to go to hell. It’s not only cost
effective, and it is free down there. Why you did not offer this
hospital the malpractice suit insurance at a lower rate?”
Sir, Saint.. Padre.. Peter Saheb, this place did not need any
insurance as long as Sr. Dr. Consilia was alive and running the
show. She was very diligent, vigilant, careful an Indian Jewel,
a Mangalorean Jasmine they say, but too timid to break any
rule! Because of her, I lost a lot of commission you know.
Doesn’t matter you don’t let any cash up here anyway, to buy a
seat closer to God.
Dr. Consilia said, “Saint Peter, why not have compassion on this
gentleman, I will glorify the Lord all the more, by singing
Magnificat.” Her compassion has spread in Heaven too.
“Helen, since you intercede, he can stay in heaven. Your
congregation, your bothers and admirers will be proud of you on
your first miracle. Hey girl, you are not only in the right
track, you are in the fast lane to sainthood! To become saint
and earn these keys to this coveted place, I had to die on the
cross upside down! Hope people are reminded often how I had to
die!
Did you say you were an organ donor? Did you say you helped the
poor? Is it true there is plenty of fish in Barkur? I will put
a word with Jesus, he likes to fish too, but just two, and then
he feeds five thousand people, at a time.”
Folks, God has said loud and clear, “Ask and it shall be given
unto you.”
Your children will witness the realization of this request.
James Fernandes,
USA
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